You do want a happily ever after, but sometimes the little things you do in your relationship, some of which you might not even be aware of, can cause irreparable harm to your marriage. Yes, we know that for a healthy and a happy marriage, both partners have to work towards it equally. But, there are certain things that women can keep in check from their end, to ensure that they do not ruin their relationship. So, here are some of the things that women do, which can destroy a marriage. And, also some ‘Healthy Marriage’ mantras that can be used to save a relationship.
#1. Finding faults all the time Constructive criticism, if it is meant to improve the marriage, is welcome. But, if you are always obsessing over the imperfections of your partner, then you are walking over troubled water. Chronic complaining tells your spouse that you are not happy with him, and he is not good enough. You might not feel this way, but this is the message you convey when you are out nit-picking on his small habits every now and then. What is even worse is when you do so in company of your family and friends.
#2. Not appreciating him enough Lack of appreciation is often one of the major causes of resentment in a marriage. It is easy to take your spouse for granted. If your partner is doing something special to make you happy, and if you fail to see his efforts and quibble on small things, then it will ruin his mood and ultimately your relationship too!
#3. Having unreasonable expectations Expecting the partner to do things that are currently beyond his capacity is the bane of every marriage. Putting pressure on him for things that you yourself know might not be reasonable for him to commit to is a smart way to erode your relationship slowly and steadily. Say, if you want to buy a bigger house or start a family, but your husband is not in a financial or mental state to commit to such a change. Well, instead of criticising him, try to understand his point of view.
#4. Not nourishing your bond You are aware of how important it is to connect with your spouse on a daily basis, but it is easy to forget when there are kids, career, and chores to manage. Keep in mind, physical and emotional shut down often leads to a big lack of intimacy. Withholding affection from your partner can cause a major disconnect that will be hard to bridge.
#5. Putting others before him After marriage, you have a new family to look after as well. While you need not break all ties with your own family and friends, understand that these new relationships are important as well. If you are always putting your family or friends before him or his family, he might not like it.
#6. Giving the silent treatment So, do you always keep your feelings pent-up and wait for him to figure out what is wrong? Well, that is what is actually wrong! He is not an expert, who will figure things out on his own based on your expressions and mood. By keeping quiet or closing communication you cannot solve any problem or resolve any issue. What’s more? Your attitude might throw him further away from the issue and the relationship.
#7. Not giving him space It is a well-known fact that men truly love their space and freedom, and this is one of the main reasons why most of them turn commitment-phobic. Calling him up every single hour, getting jealous unnecessarily, forcing him to cancel plans with his friends always- are some common things that you might be doing out of love. But, your attempts to keep your man hooked to you might actually make him run away in the opposite direction.
If you are guilty of any of these behaviours, you are putting your marriage at great risk. We all know that every relationship has to go through a fair share of ups and downs. But, when you keep certain emotions and behaviour in check, you can find a way to make your relationship last a lifetime easily!