We’re willing to bet you can close your eyes and conjure up a description of amazing, mind-blowing, tell-your-girlfriends-about-it sex. But chances are it wouldn’t be the same as someone else’s description. When it comes to sexual satisfaction, there isn’t a one-size-fits-all definition, according to a recent study published in the journal Feminism & Psychology.
So what do people find satisfying in bed? Researchers asked 40 people to rank various descriptions — like feeling emotionally close to your partner or having an orgasm — in order of importance. Then they interviewed them about the differences between good and bad sex (this obviously wasn’t a head scratcher, right?). They ended up with four main ways that people described sexual satisfaction. And apparently, great sex is in the eye of the beholder.
One definition of sexual fulfillment included feelings of trust, security, and control — basically, feeling like you can really let go during sex. The second definition involved feelings of emotional closeness and connection to a sexual partner. Interestingly, men favoured the first definition, while women favoured the second.
The third approach was a little less creative, defining sexual satisfaction as having an orgasm. And finally, the last one defined sexual fulfillment as getting your partner off. Hey, it’s good to know there are some givers out there.
Even though this was a small study, we fully support the idea that there is more than one way to define great sex. And no matter what “best sex ever” means to you, you should definitely be having it.